I wrote this and posted it on our facebook page a few days ago but I wanted to include it here as well:
Purpose. I have struggled with it my entire life. When I was younger I thought god just forgot to give me one and that maybe I’d aimlessly wander forever. It’s SO easy to see in some people- they always wanted to do a thing or become a thing or experience a thing that just led them along. But not all of us have some great sense of purpose. For some of us it is a hidden treasure that waits years for us to find it.
Today as I worked in our garden I got a little spark of purpose. Those plants were growing because I water them and cultivate them and talk nicely to them- sometimes I sing to them. I picked 9 tomatoes this morning.
And then I went to the front yard. And I saw it. The blackberry bush. I bought this and planted it when I first moved into this house about 9 years ago. Those first few years were rough on us, me and the blackberry bush. Sometimes I’d just sit outside and talk to her and cry and tell her all my sorrows. I told her to please hang on because if she died then so would I. Somehow our souls became linked. I knew that if she could survive then I would too. Today I went outside and I saw that there were a few blackberries ready to pick. And I marveled at the beauty of this bush, the long and sturdy greenery, the fruit so effortlessly held there. I saw that after the long and difficult years of cruel winters and scorching summers, she was not only alive but she was thriving. She has fulfilled her purpose beautifully.
Have I changed as much in this near-decade that I too have survived? Can this gorgeous bush see me and sense that I have grown as well? Have I produced beauty and fruit from all of my struggle? I wished that my purpose was as simple and straight-forward as this blackberry bush. She just has to grow and be a blackberry bush. That’s all. And perhaps it’s that way for me as well. All I have to do is be myself. Just me. No “doing” required, just “becoming”. Could my purpose be so simple?